We really haven't fallen off the face of the earth. I'm just not sure I have much to say. Actually, that's not true. I have lots to say. But I don't want every post to be sad and weepy.
So yes, it sucks a whole lot without Mike. More three months out than in the beginning. I think even Julia feels it. She tells me sometimes that she misses her dada. She has started crying hysterically when I drop her off at preschool because she thinks I might not come back, just like Mike isn't coming back.
As for me, I am irritable, cranky, sad, lonely, tired and utterly incapable of making a decision. Some days I can barely summon the energy to care for my daughter. Often, I waste an entire evening staring out the window.
But we're still here.